Inadequate answers to uncomfortable questions


Fast feet move throughout the day and slow toward the night When morning light arrives the feet approach timidly to the side Bear in hand and bunny in the other to see who is awake And climbing up by pulling on sheet to find a place to take

  Over the last few years many people who do not really know us have asked "when is the second arriving?" It is a funny question really as while it seems so common, it comes bundled with a great deal of personal considerations that cross boundaries, yet social convention makes people feel it is okay to ask.

When are you going to do something about your excess weight?

Are you considering seeing someone about your acne?

Have you thought about updating your clothing style a bit?

  Are they inappropriate questions?

I am a very open person in conversation and like to see how uncomfortable some people get whilst I answer their questions to the best of my ability. Those without children likely carry the worst reaction.

No, we are not planning any more children. Luckily we got the first pretty well perfect.

  Being a father has been good for me, but not good to me. It has been difficult and has brought with it a great many pressures that have taken their toll on my life in many ways. However, if given the option for a do-over, I would do it all again and willingly pay the personal prices. Parenting is the greatest investment one can make - parenting, not having kids.

As I have said before, I think those who take their role of parent seriously are likely to have a different outlook on the world than those who don't or do not have children to care for. I would say that it is a longer view and one that has to consider the risks of the world, but still be willing to take risks for the future as that is where the children will have their opportunities.

Ever since young I have taking the view that the world should be a better place for having me in it than when I first entered it. I think this is the role of everyone, but it doesn't really mean much when humans can justify their existence no matter what they actually believe.

While talking with colleagues today we were discussing the political landscape and morality of decision in the workplace. In general, pay someone enough and they will cross every line they have ever drawn in the sand, if they value what is offered more than they value their belief system. Everything is for sale though it seems, and that is why the justification can be made. I wonder where the boundaries are.

I will consume and pollute, even if I know my child will pay the price of my actions.

  It is interesting from an investment perspective if one uses the resources of today and expects others to pick up the bill tomorrow. Not much of an investment when what is invested doesn't generate anything other than a cost. It is also interesting when what one does now is not performed with any intention or consideration of the future at all - especially knowing that every movement requires energy and has repercussions.

Actions and consequence.

  I guess the reason that people do not want to put much thought into what they do past whatever they are going to enjoy in the next moment is, because to do so would unveil the future and once seen, it cannot be unseen. That means to keep on behaving in the same way would be to intentionally ignore consequence of action, something no one really wants to take the responsibility for - unless the outcomes are good. People often attribute the good result to themselves, the poor to external circumstances.

People want freedom, they want someone to grant it to them and the security of their freedom protected by others.

  That is not freedom. What is freedom is making the choice to protect others, the choice in what kind of parent one is, behavior one demonstrates and the willingness to reach out a hand to support others. The only freedoms we may have, have to be from the internal outward, and the action has to be made with intention, not habit. Acting from habit is not freedom, it is reaction to action - but the consequence is still under the umbrella of personal responsibility.

Perhaps this is what scares parents the most, the fear of having to deal with the consequences of their actions from a face they have raised themselves - a face that can ask highly appropriate but uncomfortable questions.

Why did you act like that, if you knew I would have to pay the price?

  Ignorance is not an excuse. Justifications do not grant pardons.

Taraz [ a Steem original ]


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  • @dswigle

    I agree! I can't believe how much My Views changed once I had in Offspring or three. Suddenly my actions had consequences. That is a spooky thought right there.

    Think about things that you want to join because your name will be embedded forever with them and this could affect your children. Suddenly my affiliations were reflecting back in the pool. I could go on and on but you nailed it on the head so I won't say anything more than you are so correct!

    Thanks always for your amazing writing and I apologize for being one of those that reads and runs. That's actually not fair.


  • @tarazkp

    For #Posh Twitter

  • @mattclarke

    What have future generations ever done for us?