Despite forcing my way through an almost solid wall of wind and rain, I was fairly cheery upon arriving into the office.

It was nice and early, so I knew I was guaranteed my favourite seat. The one that actually used to be mine before hot-desking became a thing.

I sauntered up to it. Across from me was a snotty Business Analyst, Wetty.

He looked up and made a mew face of greeting.


I exclaimed loudly, slamming my bag down on my desk.

I beg your pardon!?

Wetty looked outraged as if he were a young beaver noticing that Greta Thunberg did not have a flipper tail.

I sat down with a flourish and craned my neck above my twin screens.

Morning cunto?

I said as if having to explain to an old lady that wolf bagging wasn't like it was when we were young.

Wetty made a peculiar coughing noise like a Badger in deep undergrowth.

I would rather you didn't say that, please.

He said primly.

Say what? Good morning? That's not very nice, I'm only being polite.

I replied in a hurt tone.

Not that and you bloody well know it. The other thing!?

Wetty looked annoyed. And disgusted. Even a little angry. Like a young shaved gerbil after a bungled insertion.

Oh, CUNTO!!! Don't be daft man, it's a term of endearment!

I smiled brightly at him to show that we were all cuntos here.

He winced then pursed his lips in a thin disapproving line.

I don't like it. I don't want to hear it. You hear?

He said this masterfully as if we're aboard his schooner and I were but a disobedient boy in the rigging.

Alright. What about cunty-baws, that any better?

He made a strange whimpering noise in reply like a Welsh rabbit lost in a fog.

That's it. I'm done. Your language is disgraceful.

Huffily, he gathered his things and mumped off to a desk on the other side of the office.

A few minutes later one of my colleagues Angles arrived and walked over.

I waved at the seat Wetty had only just vacated.

Morning, lass! I saved your seat for you.

Steemie currently dosen't allow you to make comments. If you want to write something, write it using another frontend (like Steemit)
Click there to view this post on
  • @oaldamster

    Wow, lotsa hair n a beard, why the masculinity build up...?

    [...reading on...]

    Ow... 😁

  • @nonameslefttouse

    Today I have a question about the thumbnail.

    Did you put all those faces in there or I am just being haunted by demons?

  • @kus-knee

    Still rock'n it here boomer. So consistently good!

  • @olaf123

    But the end of all things has drawn near. Therefore be sober-minded and be sober unto prayers.(1 Peter 4:7)

    Question from the Bible, Is there such a thing as untimely death in the Bible?

    Watch the Video below to know the Answer... (Sorry for sending this comment. We are not looking for our self profit, our intentions is to preach the words of God in any means possible.) Comment what you understand of our Youtube Video to receive our full votes. We have 30,000 #SteemPower. It's our little way to Thank you, our beloved friend.
    Check our Discord Chat Join our Official Community:

  • @askmihai

    Awesome article! I wonder how many people are aware of the truth about the virus.


    Basically the media makes people believe there is a virus so people:

    What's your opinion?

  • @slobberchops

    Ooohhh.. careful he will be grassing you to Bossman El Jeffe..., corporate politics and all that.

  • @jacobtothe

    Unmatched tactical genius, if the end was your intent.